One of the shows we're captioning involves a road rally, in which some of the participants... well, let's just say that the narrator refers to "A-list Hollywood celebrity Hayden Christensen" and leave it at that.
It's pretty much explicitly a 24-minute commercial for cars that, if you've read this far, you can't afford to buy. And, like most unscripted TV with aspirations towards story, it rewards bad behaviour on the part of the "contestants." Which, considering the kind of road racing that's been making the news lately, is really beyond bad taste.
But then, in the middle of it all, just as the letter Y has started to stick because of the blood dripping down from where I've been hitting my head against the keyboard to make it hurt less, there's this bit: One of the racers lists off every single piece of equipment, "legal and illegal," that he's installed in order to evade The Man as he races down the freeway. Uxbista XR-40 radar jammer, Spanasonitron QB-pi police radio scanner, fake PA system and siren, holographic radar-diffusing paint...
The guy spends a full thirty seconds proudly listing off every single component of the $25,000 of equipment he's added on to his car. And the very next shot is of him pulled over to the side of the road while the cop leaning in towards the window explains that it's because he was going at 120 mph and the racer was going faster than he was.
If I had a happy place, I'd be in it.
I continue to work on Robotech, and today's episode contained the following dialogue:
Narrator: "Before bringing their captives to Dolza, the Zentraedi scientists subject their prisoners to a series of highly sophisticated tests."Breetai: "Hmm. This one appears to be female."
Yes, it's easy to mock. So I shall. It's probably a good thing I wasn't on the team translating the dialogue into English.
Dolza: You will demonstrate this thing you Micronians call kissing!Rick: What? No way am I kissing Ben! Uh, not that there's anything wrong with that.
Lisa: I will demonstrate. Lieutenant, I order you to kiss me.
Rick: But I've got a girlfriend. Why don't you kiss Ben?
Lisa: I'd rather do it with you.
Ben: Guys? Standing right here.
(Rick and Lisa kiss)
Zentradi Warriors: Ugh! Disgusting!
Dolza: This is how Micronians reproduce?
Konda: This, and we picked up a manual entitled Wet and Wild in Tampa, Vol. 4.
Dolza: You will demonstrate the reproductive process with this thing you call Tampa!
Rick: What?! That's disgusting! You perver-- oh, Tamp-a. Right. Yeah, Tam-- okay, yeah. Right. Jeez. Guys, don't-- don't run before you can walk.
This is probably how my friends perceive Doctor Who all the time.
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